How Do You Talk To Yourself?
The Power of Affirmations
Issue #71
Most of us have a voice inside that plants seeds of doubt in our hearts. "You can’t create. You can't paint. You can't write. You can't draw. You can't speak. You can't sing. You can’t manage...." The list goes on and on.
We call it self-talk. One expert says that 75% of what we say to ourselves is negative. Think about what you say to yourself. How often do you put yourself down? How frequently do you focus on the negative?
We need to silence that negative voice in our head by proving it wrong. Don't listen to that negative voice that is determined to make you fail. Keep managing. Keep creating. Keep writing. Keep painting. Keep drawing. Be positive.
When I teach people how to be better speakers, I talk about that second voice sitting on their shoulders. When I first started speaking, I heard two voices — the one coming out of my mouth and the one sitting on my shoulder. The one was positive and upbeat. The second was nervous and negative. The more often I spoke, the less vocal the second voice became. Today, I rarely hear that negative voice. And when I do, I kick him quickly, and he is gone.
And the same is true of my writing. I used to hear the voice of doubt shouting in my ear. Today, I can barely hear him mumble. And when he does appear, he is skin and bones and dressed in rags. Soon, he will be homeless.
In December 1982, my family and I moved from Illinois to Houston, TX. I was starting a new job as Director of Marketing for a health care company. During the 21-hour drive, I discovered Zig Ziglar on one of the talk shows. He was talking about selling, motivation, and improving one’s life. I was impressed.
I bought his book, See You At the Top, and audiotapes, which I listened to repeatedly. I love his stories and sayings. One of my favorites is that you can change who you are by changing what goes into your mind.
So began my journey of developing a positive attitude. During my first thirty years on this planet, I thought of the glass as being half-empty. Ziglar taught me that I could and should change my attitude. And I am still a work in progress, but I am much more positive today. I continue to feed my mind and heart positive affirmations.
What are you putting into your mind? Is it positive or negative? Do you need to change your self-talk?
In the late 1980s, I discovered the work of Dr. Shad Helmstetter. He had published a book, What To Say When You Talk to Your Self. He moved beyond Ziglar and demonstrated how a person could change his behavior by changing what goes into his mind.
He showed how to write positive statements that people could put into their minds and hearts. He taught people to avoid negative self-talk and to replace it with positive self-talk. He provided a tool to help people change.
Our hearts believe what we tell ourselves. If we tell ourselves negative things, then the result will be negative behavior. If we tell ourselves positive things, the result will be positive.
Since the 1980s, more studies have been conducted to verify the power and impact of positive self-talk in helping people change their behavior.
Jerry Levin has reported on that research in his new book, Affirm Yourself: 15 Principles to Retrain the Voice in Your Head. Levin offers the reader 15 principles for writing positive affirmations. The first three principles are:
Personal. The affirmation is about you, not anyone else. It should not be generic.
Present Tense. The affirmation should be spoken in the present tense, not in the future tense. For example: “I am a powerful speaker.”
Positive. The affirmation should be about positive behavior. For example: “I am healthy and fit.
As creative leaders, we should harness the power of positive self-talk and positive affirmations to help us be more innovative and imaginative. What do you want to change about yourself? How do you want to improve? Remember, you can change who you are by changing what goes into your mind.
Recommended Reading
Helmstetter, Shad. What To Say When You Talk To Your Self.
Levin, Jerry. Affirm Yourself.
Ziglar, Zig. See You At The Top.
Plant seeds of hope in the hearts of others!
Thank you for reading this issue of Creative Seeds of Hope.
Sometimes I listen to voices in my mind. Other times I hold them in my heart. Nice essay, my friend.
Harley, a great message. I'm a big fan of Zigs'; have a book, gave away a tape and love his quotes. Had some of his affirmations on my mirror awhile. We forget those truths, but as you say, when you begin to do the thing you should not do, that voice just fades out! Yep, keep making him homeless! Thanks Harley!